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KupaMan
I like to draw and complain about stuff.

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Joined on 10/20/02

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KupaMan's News

Posted by KupaMan - October 2nd, 2007


This here is part two of the Twosday '07 coverage. If you haven't read part 1 yet, I suggest you do so first.

The second show of spirit for Twosday '07 was to eat twice as much as I normally do. I started the "morning" (2:00pm PST, how fitting!) with two bowls of Raisin Bran! Thanks to that, I had an unexpected double-shit later in the day.

I then went to Jack-in-the-Box and got two plain cheese burgers. This isn't a totally accurate doubling, As I usually get something like the Boss Burger at Zips, but that's like $5 each and I'm not made of money.

I also had twice the amount of Oreos I normally have, but I don't wait to take pictures of Oreos when I eat them. They were the orange-filling Halloween ones, which was badass.

Among miscellaneous things I doubled today were many that didn't actually happen. I doubled my almost of making a flash cartoon, which, twice the almost of something is just more almost.

Anyway, this wraps up the first ever Twosday. I hope you guys celebrated and had something to show for it. I'd like to see what you all have done. I can't wait until both times next year!

Twosday '07 Holiday Wrap-Up Pt. 2!


Posted by KupaMan - October 2nd, 2007


Well, folks, the first celebrated Twosday is finally drawing to a close, and what a day has it been! I figured the best way to wrap this thing up was with a double dose of posts. This one will cover the first thing I doubled, and the next will cover the other. Are you all ready?! Let's go.

So the first of two things I decided to double today was the number of pants I usually wear. I decided early on two pairs all day would be a good way to kick off this hot new holiday, but as soon as I put them on, I realized that my two friends -- Dexter and Southpaw -- were not fans of this day of celebration. Not only did wearing two pairs of pants make it difficult to readjust them when needed, but they were also crammed tightly together. So, I abandoned wearing two pairs of pants all day, I promised to make it up to my little guys later in a very Twosday-centric sort of way. I instead opted for twice as much pop. Unfortunately, the Hindu gas station only had one MD Game Fuel left, so the doubling is only barely acceptable. In all, this was only a lukewarm celebratory gesture. I'll be sure to try twice as hard next year, ha ha!

That's it for part one of the Twosday '07 wrap-up. Here are some pics as promised.

Twosday '07 Holiday Wrap-Up Pt. 1!


Posted by KupaMan - October 2nd, 2007


As many of you may know, today is the first day of celebration for Twosday! I will be wearing two pairs of pants and eating twice as much all day. Pictures will be coming tomorrow.

For the small number of you out there who don't know yet, Twosday is a day of celebration for every second of every month if it lands on a Tuesday. This year, it landed only on October second. It will land on two days next year, which is going to be twice as good (it's a pun, ha ha!). These days are celebrated by doubling at least two activities. If this day happens to land on a February -- which is just once every several years -- you will doubling everything you do that day. I have a feeling this is going to be an amazing new holiday.

Tell two friends about this, everyone! Happy Twosday!

- Jared
- Jared


Posted by KupaMan - September 26th, 2007


So obviously Halo 3 has arrived. I was one of those douche bags who stood in line last night, ready to "Finish the Fight" even though I'm not really too big a fan of the games (they're overrated up the yang). I was hoping to play a cool campaign mode, and then shove this game away forever. Unfortunately, 5 hours into the game, it ends. While this wasn't some erotic sex of a game, it finished before I was ready. The campaign was pretty much more of the same as it has been -- it was fun and addictive, though lacking original frills -- but it's incredibly short. Halo 2 felt longer than this, and it may have been. The story wasn't bad or anything, and what was there felt finished, unlike the last game, but there just wasn't enough of it. Once again, so much of their energy spent on the online mode made for an under-produced unexciting campaign. Thanks, Bungie.

Also, the graphics were surprisingly bad. I was hoping it would be close to Gears, but it was more like an updated Halo 2.


Posted by KupaMan - September 21st, 2007


So, I got this from M-Bot today:
"This message is to inform you that the following review, which you left for Pussy Hairs on 9/15/07 at 8:44:25 PM, has been deleted:

===============
Score: 5 / 10
Summary: Wow.
Review: Interesting.
===============

Please review the review guidelines in the FAQ to ensure that you're following the rules.

Also, be aware that repeated review deletions will result in administrative action against your account."

I have two things to say.
A: I didn't violate any posting rules whatsoever. I just looked over the rules, and my review doesn't get close to any of them.
B: Have you seen that cartoon? What else if there to be said? I was literally speechless. That was fucked up.

Ah, review mods. They'll allow the "FUCK HOOKERZ, LEGENDARY FROG LIKES DIX LOL!!!" reviews, but make sure to delete my short, mediocre-scored review.

- Jared

PS: Okay, I fall under this one: "Do not post TONS and TONS of crappy reviews just to get high in the rankings. If we catch someone doing this we will delete all their reviews - wouldn't that be a pain in the ass? Take your time and write a sincere review for every movie you wish to critique. Make sure your review is relative to the submission. Reviews that are found to offer no benefit to the author may be deleted." Still, I stand to my previous point that there was nothing more that could be said regarding that cartoon. Also, this is one review, not TONS.


Posted by KupaMan - September 21st, 2007


I spend much of my time here at Newgrounds (arguably far too much) and while I enjoy exploring the products of many talented individuals' hard work, I also have to deal with the cold-yet-burning annoyance of the internet's most pathetic. These people, often called emos or fags, spend much of their time thinking much of their own ability, or rolling in a self-projected idea of being more grown up than their peers by looking deep into stuff, and crying every once in a while. That's pussy talk. The problem with these kids, this major chunk of Newgrounds, is encouragement; they have too much of it. Encouragement is the reason we have d-bags all around us. Encouragement is the reason the world of entertainment sucks in America.

Whenever you see kids dressed up in annoyingly tight pants that leave too little to the imagination (or that at least shove something you weren't planning on thinking about into mind) you have to realize that most of those teenage assholes probably went with their mom - who supports their way of expression - to get those pants, and the haircut too. Well, bitch, don't. If I'm sitting at Sbarro's, staring blindly at roughly leg level as I devour my disgusting pizza, the last thing I need is a couple of pairs of legs bound in jeans tighter than flesh. A don't need to see your fucking bulge, asshole. On top of that, I spend way too much time trying to figure out how those get on. How the hell does one get their foot through those legs? It's like your pants have to give birth to your chicken legs every single day. It's obvious that people like this have annoying moms who are proud of this kind of behavior, and don't have tell-it-like-it-is dads who don't want pussies for sons. If I tried to pull shit like that, my dad would be like, "No, you look like a queer. I'm ashamed that you even asked me. Ten laps!" I'm glad my parents don't share the encouragement that so many others' parents do.

Another big thing about this whole encouragement deal is moms (probably single ones) who tell their soon-to-be-bisexual sons it is okay to cry about stuff; it's not. It doesn't help that they watch and listen to garbage that encourages the same type of behavior. I saw a music video (or at least the first 30 seconds) where some gothy looking bitch cried for at least the first twenty seconds, into the microphone, before any music actually started. It was the lamest thing I've seen in a long time. The only thing worse is knowing that kids with good lives probably sat and cried with her. It's acceptable for people to get away with crying sometimes, like when family or dogs die (but fuck cats!), but don't cry for no fucking reason. You're blubbering solely because someone else is. Watching other people cry is not sad or evocative of anything. "I'm crying with you because we have tear ducts! This will show those damn gorillas!" Parents who let their kids cry all the time are bad parents, except when it comes to girls. Girls are a smörgåsbord of weird emotions stuffed into an enigmatic processing system.

Entertainment takes a big hit from people being too encouraging too. There's too many people who write stories and don't get critical opinions, and assume they're Shakespeare. The best thing is to have brothers who go, "this is the gayest thing I've ever read" and follow it up with fists in the face. It makes you a callous, critical asshole that doesn't produce garbage all the time. I see too many cartoons here on Newgrounds where people cry for little to know reason, or make stupid decisions, or are flat-out lame because nobody ever told them the idea sucked. Likely, they didn't share it with anyone prior to making it, but crushing early on in life should prevent that. Entertainment too often suffers because of people being too encouraging. Think of The Insane Clown Posse, for example. Rated the worst band of all time, Violent J thanks his mom in one of their tracks for being such an encouragement in his life. I think that is proof enough. It's also safe to say that anyone who calls photography an art is the same way.

This kind of encouragement isn't just on a parental scale. Think of all the film writers and directors who make a great independent film against the expectations of everyone, and then follow it up with a terrible studio production. As soon as their indie is a critical hit, some studio always scoops them up and wants them to make their next movie with them. They give them a bunch of money and suck their ass all the time. Nobody is there to cut in anymore and say, "Hey, this movie is going to suck." Then the movie comes out and the unforgiving, faceless critical body as well as the even bigger, more critical audience lets you know the fact that your movie is a giant piece of shit. A great example is Annapolis or Spider-Man 3. Of course, you still get the tight-pants-wearers who think that it's gorgeous stuff, and blubber like a vagina when Mary-Jayne breaks up with Peter Parker, even though the reason behind it practically isn't there. It's a bunch of crying for the sake of crying, people.

Encouragement has a much more useful counterpart: Disappointment. People should fear disappointment whenever they do anything. With parents who constantly encourage their kids to live their own life, they rarely dish out a slice of disappointment pie. It is possibly the best motivation short of trained lions. Being afraid to let everyone down is a great way to make the best of what you can. With disappointment lingering, there is no 'if' about whether your best is good enough; it has to be good enough or you fail. Obviously you can't meet everyone's expectations, but the less people you disappoint, the better.

All this writing really stands for nothing, though. Now that everyone's parents are overly encouraging, everything made by these walking twats is received the way they wanted. Add some crying and the viewers will cry. The damage is already done.


Posted by KupaMan - September 17th, 2007


I've decided to start a new holiday called Twosday, which falls on every 2nd day of the month, as long as that day also happens to be on Tuesday. This year, it will take place in October, and next year in September and December.

What you do on Twosday, is do twice as much of something as you normally do. For instance, you can wear twice as many pieces of clothing (an extra pair of pants, shirt, shocks, underwear), or you can eat double the servings you would normally eat of your meals. You don't have to double everything, but just find something you can do twice as much. The most important thing, though, is when someone asks why you're doubling up, tell them, "It's Twosday!"

I'll be doing my part this October 2nd. Will you?

TWOSDAY!


Posted by KupaMan - September 11th, 2007


It's September eleventh yet again, everyone. It's a pretty emotional day for a lot of people, and I think most of you know why.

In case you don't know, it was seventeen years ago to the day that my parents got divorced. That's right. All those crazy bursts of neo-feminism and adulterous moments with one Mr. Fretwell led up to this infamous day. It was a tragic day for everyone, but I'll never cry.

9-11-90
NEVER FORGET


Posted by KupaMan - September 6th, 2007


In case you weren't aware, I'm kind of a dick when it comes to flash reviews. I try to be as critical (not in a necessarily negative sense) and analytical as possible. But when I write some of my reviews that catch the author's eye, they generally reply with "Well, to each his own," or "it's just a matter of taste or opinion." I often get authors who defend their content by citing the number of people who disagree with me. That bugs me. A lot.

"Well, Kupes, it's just a matter of opinion." No shit. You don't need to tell me that my taste in comedy is different than some other fucker's. Now, usually this is in response to "This wasn't engaging/funny/interesting," which, sure, the response is kind of fair for my piece of shit review. But I am enfolding that not much happened. It's not that my taste is shit, because I can get into a lot of kinds of humor, or at least see how it could be found funny, but when I'm watching a flash whose punchline is borderline Family Circus, I have to let them know.
Also, I review based on overall quality, so while I may not enjoy a video, its merits are still to be praised. There are tons of cartoons I've watched that were totally lame and cheesy that I had to commend for quality (Aladdin 3150 is a great example).

"Well, clearly you're a minority, because 27 out of 28 pages disagree with your feelings." I don't give a fuck. There was a particular cartoon I reviewed not too long ago that had 27 or so pages of just 10s, two pages of 9s, and then two more pages of 8 through 0, and while the author didn't pull this line on me, a few of his fans did. The number of people on my side in the review doesn't matter to me, nor does it affect the score. This is still "my opinion," so let me express it. I never leave reviews with low scores without explaining myself (I'm sure I used to, but I haven't in a long time), so these authors don't need to tell me that I am wrong, attack my points ("It's called the style of it LOLZ," "I'm not a professional WTF"), or bring me into it ("Like you could make anything better ZOMFG"). Obviously a lot of them are going to disagree with me, but none of them even consider my suggestions for improvement. One unnamed series' creator seemed to take particular offense to my suggestion, placed himself above me with all his high-scoring cartoons, and stuck with what he was doing. Those same problems still melt my eyes in his cartoons to this day. But they were popular, so of course he doesn't give a shit what I think.

I also must point out to people who bitch about my reviews; a 5 or a 6 isn't s super bad score. Most videos that I don't like at all get a 5 or 6, and yet it's apparently the end of the world. Almost nothing with effort applied to it deserves anything below a 5, unless it's like, gay porn or something (which, come to think of it, I scored The Ultimate Orgy pretty highly).

Also, for those of you who review my cartoons, please treat your reviews the same way I treat mine. I know my cartoons aren't golden nuggets shat from Zeus himself, but I need you to tell me why they were worth a full 0 out of a possible 10. The simple "FUCK YOU, FAGGOT" message body doesn't help me much. I don't know how I'm supposed to improve, and I don't know how to fuck myself.


Posted by KupaMan - September 3rd, 2007


Well, I finally got around to making another cartoon this year. Please, if you could, go check out The Parfait. It got lost early in the morning to many other cartoons, so not many people got a chance to watch it.
The cartoon was a 24-hour flash, meaning I made it in a single day from concept to completion. This is one of the better ones that we have made, I believe. If any of you have seen The Orange Man, it's kind of a spiritual sequel to that.

Now if you all will excuse me, I must get back to Warhawk, Ingus 9, and a mockumentary project involving gay horse-people.

- Jared

The Parfait